As you’ve heard, the number one way to succeed is to set goals. But did you know that setting goals can be counterproductive to your success? The mere act of writing a goal can become an addiction, sabotaging your efforts in the process.
In this article, I will dive into the mind games goal setting plays on your brain. How to recognize them and what to do about it.
Before we dive into the details, I want to preface my article with this: I believe that personal goal setting can change your life! I’m not against it; I’m 100%, unequivocally for; setting goals. But like anything, if done incorrectly, you will do more harm than good.
Let’s play ball!
Setting Goals is an Addiction
Have you ever done cocaine?
(Crickets…as some people are starting to feel a little uncomfortable)
Although you may never snort cocaine, the same chemicals released when sniffing the white powder, is the same drug released when you’re setting goals. According to Lifehack, “Dopamine is related to wanting – to desire. Paying attention to your goals feels good and encourages you to spend more time paying attention to your goals .”
But there lies the problem, you can get addicted to paying attention to your goals without doing anything about it!
Therefore, setting goals can become addicting, like really addictive! Like, I need another hit addiction. All my productive people know what I’m talking about.
I’ve been a die-hard goal-setter since I was a teenager. I’ve always set goals, ask anybody who knows me. Since a lad, I had folders with my goals written in them. Charts with graphs to break down the next action steps.
But catch this! Over time I noticed when I don’t set goals for several days (God forbid weeks), I get anxious, and I suffer some sort of withdrawal. It’s like my mind craves the dopamine of progress. And when that progress is absent, I notice it.
I need order – I need structure in my life! If I go a week without my to-do list, I literally, and I mean this, literally go crazy.
So how do you overcome the dopamine rush and emotional high you get from setting and reviewing your goals? YOU DONT! Because your brain cannot distinguish between (1) the things that you want and (2) the things that you already have, but more on that later!
Your brain cannot distinguish between the things that you want and the things that you already have!
So how do you overcome the dopamine rush and emotional high you get from setting and reviewing your goals?
YOU DONT! Because your brain cannot distinguish between (1) the things that you want and (2) the things that you already have, but more on that later!
I’ve found the best way to counteract this head rush is to understand that setting a goal is an activity, not the target! Don’t get high on your own supply, mannn’ (in my Chris Tucker voice).
After you set the goal – your brain will feel good. After you visualize the target (as you should) – your mind will feel good. But this feel-good energy is only meant to push you toward completion, not intoxication.
Don’t become a professional goal setter, a dreamer, a talker with no action. You still haven’t hit the target! You have to do the work.
No matter how long it takes or how long you strive. Until your goal is realized in your subconscious, it won’t manifest in the physical. The process of setting goals will get you high via dopamine (that’s a scientific fact), but just remember, goal setting is an activity, enjoy the process, execute and hit your target.
Let’s move on.
Setting Goals Will Trick Your Brain
Have you ever had a friend who always talks about something that he doesn’t believe? You don’t believe it, he doesn’t believe it, and everybody knows it! We all have these friends.
They come around talking about how they’re going to start a million-dollar business and buy an island off the coast of Greece by next year. But sit at home all day playing video games and browsing Instagram. When you look into his/her eyes, you know they don’t believe it! They’re just talking.
Well, the same type of effect happens to your brain when you set goals. But the caveat is, your mind truly believes it. Whatever you tell your brain, it takes it as fact, reality, or something that’s already occurred.
Whatever you tell your brain, it takes it as fact, reality, or something that's already occurred.
According to Goal Setting Basics, when you set a goal, your brain believes that the goal was achieved. Your mind thinks it’s finished. So, in turn, it stops investing energy toward future actions because in its world – that goal was completed when you set it. Deep!
Welcome to the Matrix…
But what does this mean?
This means that your brain works against you every time you set and/or review your goals. Since the mind already thinks that ‘said goal’ is already completed, it drops the urgency on your mental to-do list, restricting redirecting resources for other tasks.
But catch this! As time passes and for whatever reason, you don’t accomplish your goal – your brain starts to experience what psychologists call ‘consistent tension that your brains seek to resolve.’ This tension is also known as Cognitive Dissonance, stress, or some form of fear and anxiety.
This constant state of mental disconnect is caused by setting expectations that don’t match your reality. In your brain’s world, the goal it ‘thought,’ it finished when you first set it doesn’t match your current existence.
This, in turn, causes more stress, fear, and anxiety, which leads to a vicious cycle of fear and depression; if left unchecked. Your dopamine levels plummet because your mental reality doesn’t match your physical reality.
Which brings us to the next problem!
The Endowment Effect. Based on Cornell University research, the endowment effect occurs when you take ownership of an object (i.e., goal, person, idea), making it “yours” and it becomes an integral part of your identity.
When you set a goal, your brain ties that goal and its outcome to your self-image. So, when you don’t achieve ‘said goal,’ your brain suffers a loss of a valued possession (in your mind). Which, in turn, lowers your self-image, creating more stress and fear, which leads to more anxiety and depression.
I told you this was deep!
So peep this.
Not only do you have to deal with a (1) a dopamine rush from setting and/or reviewing the goal, you’ll have to manage (2) cognitive dissonance because your brain believed ‘said goal’ was finished, but when that doesn’t match your physical reality it creates tension. Also, you must beware of the (3) endowment effect, which attaches the goal to your self-identity. So when you fail to reach your goal, your self-identity goes out the window!
And the cycle repeats…
Only if you let it.
To combat the (1) stress and tension, along with (2) the urge to lower your self-identity, you must trust the process and counteract with relentless execution. EXECUTION is the only solution to tip the scales. I’m a true believer in action, I’m relentless in my onslaught.
One of my affirmations is, “You won’t outwork me, you won’t out-strategize me, and you won’t outexecute me” – Period!
When you set a goal, your brain ties that goal and its outcome to your self-image. So, when you don’t achieve ‘said goal,’ your brain suffers a loss of a valued possession (in your mind). Which, in turn, lowers your self-image, creating more stress and fear, which leads to more anxiety and depression.
I told you this was deep!
So peep this.
Not only do you have to deal with a (1) a dopamine rush from setting and/or reviewing the goal, you’ll have to manage (2) cognitive dissonance because your brain believed ‘said goal’ was finished, but when that doesn’t match your physical reality it creates tension. Also, you must beware of the (3) endowment effect, which attaches the goal to your self-identity. So when you fail to reach your goal, your self-identity goes out the window!
And the cycle repeats…
Only if you let it.
To combat the (1) stress and tension, along with (2) the urge to lower your self-identity, you must trust the process and counteract with relentless execution. EXECUTION is the only solution to tip the scales. I’m a true believer in action, I’m relentless in my onslaught.
One of my affirmations is, “You won’t outwork me, you won’t out-strategize me, and you won’t outexecute me” – Period!
#NoExcuses, 10X.
Now, this may be a little over the edge, especially when my Dallas Cowboys are playing, but I genuinely believe this. Learning (i.e., taking a loss) is a part of life, but I won’t lose to a lack of hustle, drive, or execution.
You must outexecute your brain and the mental games it plays on your mind when you set goals. Mel Robbins (who is fantastic btw) talks about this phenomenon in her book “The 5 Second Rule”. According to Mel, the 5 Second Rule is simple. If you have the instinct to act on a goal, you must physically move within 5 seconds of your brain will kill it.
If you have the instinct to act on a goal, you must physically move within 5 seconds of your brain will kill it.
In order words, execution is the only solution to outsmart the mind games your brain plays on (1) you and (2) setting goals.
To be successful, you must follow the principle of rapid execution. If you can’t purchase Mel’s book, watch the video on Impact Theory, or read the blog article.
Do something. Act now and do not delay!
When your mind is playing tricks on you, relentless action is the only solution.
Setting Goals will Limit Your Potential
When my son, Zion Bowser was 9 months old I noticed something.
He will literally roll off the edge of the bed, no problem! Headfirst. Boom!
Zion will cry for a little while, become a bit cranky and protest for his pacifier. But give him an hour.
Put him back on the bed, and guess what?
You guessed it.
He’ll roll – right off the edge of the bed again, no problem; head first!
Why?
Because my infant son at 9 months old has no concept of his limitations. He has NO FEAR when he exceeds his limitations (e.g., edge of the bed) because he has no boundaries.
Although I’m 100% unequivocally for goal setting. Setting goals at work, setting goals in life, and setting goals for business; will limit you! A goal in and of itself is a limitation that defines (or should define) your maximum potential.
Simply put, when you set a goal, you set a limit. But is this limitation all that exists in the ethos; certainly not. What if you could do more? What if you could be more? What if this invisible boundary is only 20% of your true potential.
Which brings us to how you compromise your own success. You sabotage your potential when you set goals (i.e., limits) based on current knowledge to predict future events about what you ‘think is true.’
But wait! For the s#%# kicker…
Once you complete and/or surpass your goal, you inevitably learn that your goal was just a fraction of what you’re capable of. In the process of accomplishing the goal, you were met with fear because you reached beyond your comfort zone.
So you’re always presented with the choice. (1) Stay comfortable and fall short of your true potential, or (2) live in a constant state of tension because you’re always stretching the limits.
As Les Brown said, “For some people, a common hell is better than an uncommon heaven.”
And the cycle continues…
So how do you transcend the boundary of your limiting beliefs? You have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable! In the words of Gary John Bishop and his book ‘Unfu*k Yourself’ – you have to embrace the uncertainty.
Whenever I recognize I’m in an uncomfortable situation, with the possibility to grow, at that moment, I get bold. I get fierce because I know that my next level is right behind this wall of fear I’m facing.
Grant Cardone says it best, “you need some new problems.” If you still have the same problems that you had 5 years ago, you haven’t grown. If you’re still dealing with the issues that you dealt with 3 years ago, you’re still stuck within the boundaries of your comfort level.
Being stuck has nothing to do with a lack of opportunity to grow and get more out of life. You’re stuck because every time you felt the fear, you high tailed it back to your commonplace. You went back to your comfort zone!
In life, we set goals because we want certainty in an uncertain world. Embrace it. This won’t change!
But within this uncertainty lies everything you’ve ever wanted.
Take it.
Because life has no limit.
How to Set Goals Correctly
If you’re reading this article, I believe you already understand the basics of setting goals. Therefore I’ll keep this really simple.
First things first, use the SMART goal framework to set all your goals. This process will take more time and mental bandwidth, but if done correctly, you’ll almost sure up your success.
The SMART Goal framework is based on the following criteria:
- Specific – your goal must state what you want to achieve. Be as accurate as possible.
- Measurable – your goal must have a quantifiable component attached to it. You must define when your goal is deemed complete.
- Actionable – your goal should begin with an action (e.g., work, convert, save).
- Realistic – your goal must be reasonable, set something in your discomfort zone.
- Time-bound – your goal must have a time component attached to it. A goal without a date is just a dream!
A sample goal would be, by December 31, 2019, my company will double website conversions by 30% and implement a lead magnet to generate $10K in yearly revenue.
Got it. Good!
The next step.
After you’ve finished the SMART goal framework, it’s essential to be sure the goal will make you stretch. Remember, a goal isn’t about the end result; it is about the person you’ll become during the process.
A goal isn't about the end result; it is about the person you'll become during the process.
According to Michael Hyatt’s book “Your Best Year Ever,” goals are in one of these three categories; (1) comfort zone, (2) discomfort zone, and (3) disillusion zone. Every goal you set should always be in your discomfort zone.
Your goal should be clear (i.e., the SMART framework), but it should also make you feel the tension and/or excitement of its accomplishment. It should make you feel the rush and discomfort, knowing that it will take another level.
Lastly, list a simple action plan immediately.
After you’ve written your goal and confirmed it’s in the discomfort zone, you must identify the next action steps. This is very important — do not wait to do this.
The number #1 reason we never finish our goals is that we don’t have a plan, and the process is fuzzy.
Over the years, I’ve noticed specific projects would always give me a negative vibe. For example, I would open a ‘sample goal’ in Notion, and every time, without fail, I felt uneasy about the goal. Once, I felt some type of way about finishing ‘sample goal’ — I would rarely do anything to bring it to completion.
I found that I would never follow through on some goals because I never had a plan. Internally, I knew it. So my brain would fire off in many different directions because I never listed clear next action steps.
Always have subtasks for every goal. This is very important — do not wait to do this!
In conclusion, to set a goal correctly (1) use the SMART framework, (2) confirm you’re in your discomfort zone, and (3) list the next action steps immediately.
Final Thoughts
Setting goals can be a fantastic experience. But for the sake of this article, I substituted the amazing for a dose of reality.
The truth is, setting goals can be counterproductive and compromise your success. Goal setting gets addictive (e.g., dopamine), but this addiction can backfire, playing tricks on your mind that will cause constant tension and stress.
In this article, we reviewed how to combat tension in setting goals. We discussed why it happens and what to do about it. We also explained how setting goals limits your potential and how to expand the boundaries of your comfort zone.
Take this advice to heart.
And remember this, life is what you make, so make it a masterpiece! And in the words of Mae West, “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
#StayFocused
Bowser
